A Poet's Testimony (Part 5)

A Poet’s Testimony (Part 5)

I left work nine months short of a bridge to full retirement, with an eleven month continuation of my monthly salary  (a month for every two years of service), and the after-tax cash buy-out of my contributions to the retirement fund. Essentially, I could continue living as I had been for about a year before my world would collapse.

It is always inevitable that as companies grow, regulations increase, and profits become more important than people, success comes with employing new technologies, streamlining tasks, and down-sizing the workforce.  Previous to losing my job, I had survived five company down-sizing efforts and over the course of five years, watched many of my friends and peers lose their jobs. After watching so many of my friends lose their jobs, I decided to make myself financially liquid two years prior to losing my own job. I sold my retirement home on the river and used the profits to put a down payment on two duplex apartment buildings and bought a third larger and newer duplex in the country with no money down on a 30 year VA loan. The third duplex in the country was the one we called home.

Our medical insurance was transferred over to Cobra and skyrocketed to nearly a thousand dollars a month. Seeking another source of income to help pay the bills when my monthly salary would expire in a year, I took the buy-out from my retirement and put 20% down on two additional duplex apartments. We now had a total of five duplexes. As I rushed to remodel the two newly purchased duplexes, it became apparent that we would not be able to keep up with the mortgage on our duplex in the country. We put it up for sale, sold it and came just short of breaking even. Then we moved into one of the apartments I was renovating. By the grace of God, we managed to get the remaining apartments remodeled and rented just before the cash ran out.

Then the new year and income tax time rolled around and we received the shocker of our lives. My after-tax cash buy-out was now taxable as income towards the purchase of our newly acquired duplexes. I had a reported income greater than what I paid taxes on, I owed the IRS $40,000 and interest was accumulating at $80 a day. I had no money to speak of, minimum income from the apartments, and no way to pay them off. I was forced to sell off one of my earlier duplexes that I had put a large down payment on for a loss. When I first attempted to pay off the IRS, they would not accept the check because three days interest had accumulated while it was in the mail and it was not considered payment in full. I ended up having to overpay them and wait another two years to get my money back.

Shortly after paying off the IRS, a couple of roof rafters collapsed from the weight of snow in the apartment we were living in and we awoke to water running all over my wife’s cherry dining-room table and chairs. I managed to get the roof rafters jacked back up and secured from inside the attic and paid some kids to shovel off the roof. We were thankful that it did not happen at one of the units we were renting.

Before losing my job, I was a collector of animal graphic ginger beer bottles from the 1800s.  I had acquired every animal graphic made in Canada, the U.S., and most from England; as well as a few from Australia, New Zealand, and South Africa. Considering my circumstances, I quickly realized that the fun had been in the collecting, not the owning. The internet was changing everything; eBay was just coming into its own and some of the rarer bottles that I had paid $50 or $60 for were now selling for $300 to $1200. I began selling off my collection that had taken me since college to acquire; a bottle at a time to help pay the bills.

We had purchased and sold enough properties by that time that my wife had become friends with a few of the realtors. When a couple of the ladies broke off to start their own real-estate company, they asked my wife to come along, and so she tried her hand at real estate. She was the low gal on the totem pole in a start-up company so there unfortunately weren’t a lot of profits to be made in the short-term.

By the end of my second year of being out of work, I had flown out of state for several job interviews and had countless phone interviews, but no job offers. Then one day, long after all the profitable bottles had been sold, my wife was leaving for work and told me that we had only $800.00 in the bank and that she had no idea how we would be able to buy groceries and make our mortgage payments that month. This was the first time that she had shown any outward sign of fear or worry since I had been out of work. I broke down as soon as she pulled out of the driveway and fell to my knees in prayer, “My God, haven’t I done all that you asked of me? What more can I do? My wife is afraid and I have no way to comfort or reassure her. How can I provide for her? My life and subsistence is in your hands.”

Ten minutes later, the phone rang with what would turn out to be the best  job offer of my entire life from an interview that I had had three days previous. I got off the phone and was driven to my knees by the power of the Holy Spirit. I lifted my arms and began to weep. I praised God for His mercy and grace. This was a job in Wisconsin and it took every bit of our $800.00 to get out there and get set-up. My first paycheck was just in time to pay the mortgages and buy some groceries.

Once there, God spoke to my heart through the power of the Holy Spirit; saying, “This is your time on the mountain. Use it wisely.” This was an answering to prayer and I knew then that my time alone was meant to serve God. I began to pen First Vespers and God again spoke to me through the power of the Holy Spirit to reassure me of my path. The miracles that I have seen are more than this testimony and too many to list. By the grace of God, Jesus has stood in my filthy, dirty house and He has washed it clean with the brightness of His light.

A Poet’s Testimony (Part 4)

A Poet’s Testimony (Part 4)

Finally out of college, I landed what most would consider a dream job; I was an Instrument & Controls technician for a nuclear power plant still under construction in Oswego, New York. Once built, the plant had an expected life of forty years. If I played my cards right, I would be set for life. While under construction and before the NRC established mandatory fatigue rules, I was working twelve hours a day, seven days a week, and rolling in the dough; however, I had no time to spend any of it. All I did was sleep, eat and work.

I obviously have no justifiable right to complain about work, as most people would have done almost anything to have the job I had, but the grass is not always greener. My wife, the boys, and I lived comfortably, but I was miserable. After the construction was complete, things weren’t much better. I went into management and quickly found out that I could get paid the same for working sixty hours as for forty hours and that fifty plus hours were expected each week. Still I managed to go to college nights for the next ten years and finished my Engineering Degree, usually one course at a time. I even went after my Master’s Degree for a bit, but finally had enough and dropped out nine credits short of finishing. My additional education hadn’t earned me an extra dime at work and I was tired of spending every free minute studying. I wanted some kind of normalcy in my life.

One emergency, one project, one cause evaluation, just leads to another. As soon as I finished working weekends to get some new thing up and running, it would be time for me to gear up for the next new thing. It never stopped and my time was never my own.  My wife and I tried going to church on the weekends when we could and I still read the Bible when I could, but that was the extent of our Christian life. I had no fellowship with other Christians and I was about as far from God as a believer could be. After twenty years, I didn’t like myself much. I was short with people and often lost my temper with my boys. My wife seldom got the attention she deserved and I complained incessantly. Deep down, I knew that I wasn’t living the life that God had intended for me; I had chosen profits and material goods over spiritual growth.

After my sons had left home and they began taking care of themselves, I became a little bolder and more outspoken at work. The last two years I spent daily praying that God would somehow free me from my bondage so that I could come to know Him and live the life He had intended for me. I couldn’t imagine how God could do this without destroying everything about me, but I knew that if anyone could pull it off, it would be God.

Twenty-two years into my career, my six co-workers and I were called into a closed door meeting with our Director. The Director began to belittle us for not contributing to a company sponsored charity. I won’t mention the name of the charity, but I will tell you that they had just received a considerable amount of negative press concerning misappropriation of funds, exorbitant salaries, private jets, and expensive out-of-town parties. It was known at the time that less than 60% of a given contribution would actually reach the charity and I had a list of all the senior management contributors in my pocket. I could have kept my mouth shut like everyone else that morning and I could have been a good employee, but I just couldn’t take the hypocrisy and lying anymore. Before I knew it, the words just came out of my mouth, “I have a list here of all the senior management contributors and you’re not on it.” The Director stuttered for a bit and finally managed to spit out, “I have a wife and three kids.” Again, my mouth moved without restraint, “So does everyone else in this room so you have no right to tell us what charities we should contribute to.” The meeting was quickly adjourned and I went from being an exemplar employee to an employee needing improvement in one day. Every line of my six-page performance appraisal was lined out and replaced with the same hand-written note; “David does not know how to act professionally in a public meeting.” Two weeks later, the company had a downsizing based on people’s performance appraisals. Mine was one of the lowest on site and I at last found my freedom.

For me, an enormous weight was lifted off my chest on the day I was let go; I felt a peace that I hadn’t experienced in over twenty years.  Not everyone of course took the news so well and security guards were present when the notifications were made. My Director personally escorted me off-site; he apologized for the way things turned out and seemed puzzled as to why I was selected. I reminded him of my most recent performance appraisal, but also assured him that he should not give it another thought. I remember saying, “This might just be the best day of my life.” I left there with the biggest smile on my face, absolutely confident that God had other plans for me.